Do you love your work?
Herzberg noticed that one of the important motivators for people at work is that they gain satisfaction from their job. By separating the hygiene factors, i.e. the things that if not there lead to demotivation, from the actual motivators, i.e. things that produce significant increase in productivity, he made a significant contribution to understanding behaviour at work.
Herzberg listed, achievement, recognition, work itself, responsibility and advancement as the true motivators. If we look at these factors and apply them to ourselves, we may find that when they are all present we could say that we love our work and feel a sense of commitment to the company, the team or the boss etc.
In Emotional Assertiveness seminars, I make the point that love is not a feeling it is a definition of the state of a relationship and all feelings are appropriate when we think of love. There are many words for love in the Greek language, with each Greek word having a very different meaning. Our English word love is therefore rather restricting as the richness of meaning is lost without deeper discussion of ‘what is love’. For the sake of brevity, I will stick with just one of the Greek words we translate into love, agape.
I was drawn to think about this at my grandson’s wedding where the traditional reading from Paul on the topic of love was read, causing lumps in the throats of several people. For those who want to look it is to be found in 1 Corinthians 13. Throughout this passage, the Greek word we translate as love is ἀγάπη agape. Agape is used consistently in this short passage and the meaning of agape is found in our concept of goodwill, benevolence, and sheer delight in the object of the love. In short, it’s about commitment.
This verse is so regularly read at weddings because it focuses on love and we feel romantic and warm when we hear it. However, when we discover what it really means we may be rather less enthusiastic and perhaps even challenged. The word describes serving, loyalty, commitments and attachment. Unlike our English word love, agape is never used to refer to romantic or erotic love; the Greek word for this is Eros. Neither does agape refer to close friendship or brotherly love, the Greek word this is philia.
Agape love is centred upon faithfulness, commitment, and steadfastness, and is an act of the will, we decide to commit ourselves. It is more about our dedication, our character and is a declaration of intent to stick with the other through thick and thin. This kind of love is shown through actions, not words. It is not saying “I love you.” rather it is loving by showing one’s commitment to the other. So how can an employer demonstrate this agape to their employees and by so doing invite it in return?
Teams and organisations based upon agape love are found where Tuckman’s concept of performing, the fourth stage of group development, is operable. This is where the group, team or organisation has alignment to the key objectives and teams are working synergistically. They perform out of a sense of ‘brotherhood’ even if this is seldom in the front of the mind. It is key to all good teamwork. How can we encourage our employees to want to give agape to the organisation and to their colleagues?
When I look at relationships in Emotional Assertiveness terms, I make my focal point the importance of treating others and ourselves with respect. Maintaining, as far as is possible, a sense of equality in our connectedness to others is where this begins and ends. It is about loving other people with agape love, who so ever they be, including best friends, bitter enemies and just as importantly ourselves. Because agape love is not based upon a feeling; it is an act of the will, the resolve to put the welfare of others equal to our own welfare, we need to look at how do we act to engender this organisationally.
Agape love is rare and does not come automatically, but flows from a philosophy, or a culture. Does your corporate culture have respect for the individual at its core? Is this evident in the behaviours of managers towards staff, staff towards each other and the organisation towards the customer? If the answer to these questions is yes, then you will see agape being worked out each day in your organisation.
Alignment will be something that flows from commitment and does not have to be imposed or worked at. Going the extra mile will be the norm in your culture and rewarding this by reciprocity will also be clear and visible. You will have a truly synergistic organisation. When we commit ourselves to another and mean it, we need to have agape, to stay with it. When the going gets tough we need to embrace the concept of living from the I’m OK and You are OK existential life position, and this is not easy.
Living this philosophy does not come naturally we must examine our motives on a regular basis and when we do, we find change of behaviour becomes easier. Emotional Assertiveness helps us to utilise the power of emotion in the process of forming healthy bonds, especially important if we want to foster agape in our organisational culture. This also holds true for our personal relationships, agape is central to long term trust and commitment.
My challenge to us all is to look at how we manage our interpersonal relationships in the workplace. It is difficult to achieve this with those to whom we are deeply committed, our friends, our neighbours, and family, it is even more difficult in the workplace especially if we do not find motivation there. However, we are at work for a very large part of our lives, it needs to be a place where we like to be, where we are stimulated, where we have friends not only colleagues. We need to be happy in our work, then we are happy working hard.
Emotional Assertiveness helps us to find the humanity in everyone and to do our utmost to keep good will towards men at the heart of our way of life. I call upon us all to seek out the human in all our workmates, the ones we like, the ones we find OK and even the ones we only tolerate. Agape at work will not only be good for the company, it will be good for each of us. In the words of John Lennon,
“You may say I’m a dreamer; but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us and the world will be as one.” Imagine John Lennon.
With love
John