As a child, I recall my grandmother saying, “Good fences make good neighbours.” Back then I had no idea what she was talking about. When I became a therapist I finally understood, interpersonal boundaries are essential to having healthy relationships. Respect for self and other requires a clear identification of our interpersonal boundaries and a commitment to respect each other’s personal space.
What has this to do with leadership? A good leader is acutely aware of three essential boundaries and manages them with flexibility and care.
First there is the boundary between the area of responsibility that they have been given, i.e. the goals and objectives of the team, or their ‘span of control’. When thinking about teams, this boundary defines who is in the team and who is not. It clarifies what the leader and the group are in control of. This boundary is initially defined by the hierarchy of the organisation and once established the leader is the person who manages this area. It is a key part of the leadership role to keep this boundary intact, and this includes resisting any interference in the workings of the team by the boss. Such interference is often referred to as micromanagement and undermines leadership authority. Having delegated this area of responsibility to the team leader, the boss needs to keep hands off; working with the leader’s subordinates through the leader and not bypassing him or her. This boundary is defined as the external boundary. A failure of leadership to recognise and respect this boundary will inevitably lead to a failure of the team.
Second is the boundary between the leader and the team members, it defines who is responsible for completing formal leadership roles. Clear assumption of leadership defines the leadership boundary and this boundary is defined as the major internal boundary.
When it is clear who is the leader and who are the followers there is clarity about the three key parameters of leadership:
Authority, including management of people, budget, task and resources.
Responsibility, the definition of who is dedicated to doing what.
Accountability, the clear line of organisational structure denoting whose name is on the final discharge of the task, i.e. who is answerable or who takes the buck.
All leaders need to be acutely aware of these three important parameters of power. Never take responsibility for something over which you have no authority, because if you do not have the authority and you accept responsibility you will still be accountable.
Thirdly we have the interpersonal boundaries that exist between each of the members of the group. Respect for these boundaries is essential for the group to be able to work together as a cohesive team. These boundaries are often blurred, and when this happens the group becomes dysfunctional. We all have our personal boundaries and the more aware we are of them the better we are at relating respectfully. Respect is vital if human beings are to live together and function cooperatively. The more we become aware of where these interpersonal boundaries are, the more cohesive we can be as a team. Paying attention to interpersonal boundaries is key in developing an effective group of followers. The membership interpersonal boundaries are defined as the minor internal boundaries of the group. The term minor does not reflect upon the importance of the boundaries and is only to differentiate this boundary from the leadership boundary.
Theory of group dynamics. Many people have written about group dynamics, most notably Eric Berne, who looks at the topic from a psychological perspective, and Bruce Tuckman, who looks at it from a developmental perspective. The common theme is that when a group is created it passes through various stages of development, and it is not until the group arrives at the final stage of development that it is at optimum effectiveness as group. Closer examination of the theories shows that during these stages of development the group boundaries are being established and clarified. Good leadership and followership training, or teambuilding will raise the awareness of the leader and the group to the importance of recognising and respecting these boundaries.
In Tuckman’s model of Forming, Storming, Norming and Performing, and in Berne’s model of Group Imagoes, we can see how group performance energy is vectored. In the early stages of group development much of the energy of the group is channelled into clarifying the boundaries and managing interpersonal conflict. Effectively little energy goes into achieving the goals at this time.
- Stage 1 Forming: Who is in and who is out and what are the objectives?
- Stage 2 Storming: Who is the leader and what kind of leader is this person?
- Stage 3 Norming: How do we want to do things around here?
- Stage 4 Performing: Let’s get on with the work at hand and support each
Only at the performing stage do we see synergy, we get more out of the group than the sum-total of input. A functioning group acts like an energy amplifier when most of the group’s energy is vectored towards excellence!
Leadership tools: What tools do leaders require whilst leading their team through the stages of group development? The most important tool leaders possess is himself/herself. Each stage of development calls for the leader to apply the most appropriate form of management style.
Stage 1 Forming calls for the Benevolent Autocratic style. The leader must ensure the external boundary is clear and secure – who are the members. They must ensure that the group has the necessary equipment, that all know who is in charge and that introductions or inductions are made. They must also be very clear about the task. All leadership interventions must be win/win, respectful communications.
Stage 2 Storming calls for a Democratic style of leadership. During this stage, there is often agitation across the leadership boundary, with individual group members making covert leadership challenges, usually disguised under cover of questioning the task or the nature of the task. Leaders must remain win/win and respectful, allowing room for testing whilst keeping their eye on the task, not looking hurt or disturbed and holding the boundaries.
Stage 3 Norming calls for the Benevolent leadership style. During this stage, the group begin to negotiate to create the team’s unique identity, the team ethos. Once again from a win/win position the leader facilitates this, making room for suggestions and avoiding being over rigid. This stage is preparing the team to move into the final stage where they are really working together in a powerful and cooperative way.
Stage 4 Performing calls for the leader to adopt a Laissez Faire leadership style. It is a time where leadership roles can be allowed to move around the team, where the leader can ‘let go and let the team’. However, at no time does the leader abandon the team or relinquish their responsibility. Rather they quietly manage the overall process, shifting their leadership style as the situation calls for it. Once again, leadership is guided by the principal of being respectful and remains a win/win style.
Do leaders naturally have these tools? Yes and no! We see from the Process Commination Model® that because each of us has all the different types of personality within us, we also have the potential to utilise each of the management styles (known as Intervention styles in PCM®). However, we also see that we have more or less capacity for the different styles depending upon the structure of our personality. Fortunately, we can learn and practice to be more comfortable with styles less energised in us. Furthermore, one of the things we train in PCM seminars is flexibility and individualised communication suited to the team members.
Emotional Assertiveness training also enables people to build stronger and more functional interpersonal relationships. Once again one of the focusses of Emotional Assertiveness training is building healthy relationships based upon respect for interpersonal boundaries, self and others. Emotional Assertiveness proposes that self-awareness, self-management, interpersonal awareness and interpersonal management, in relation to the expression of healthy emotions holds the key to achieving the performing stage and becoming a group demonstrating synergy.
Team building and leadership skills training will also equip leaders and followers to develop the effectiveness of their teams. The work of John Adair examines the need to balance the demands of the task, the team and individuals, whilst managing the total situation.
These topics and more are offered by John Parr (MSc), the founder and creator of The Emotional Assertiveness Model, and you can find out more about John either on his profile here or on LinkedIn.